Jul 17

8 Gay Relationship Mistakes

Mistake 1:
Open Relationships: First thing comes to my mind, define “open”? Relationships are build with mutually understood boundaries and agreements, both of which need to be checked and discussed about every 3-6 months.
No boundaries, no agreements, no relationship.
Mistake 2:
Being Clingy: It’s not healthy to be too clingy in your gay relationship. Admittedly, getting a gay guy to commit is tough, so watch out “cling on” effect.


Find balance between “to cling, or not to cling.”

Mistake 3:
Say what you mean: If you’re confused by this concept, then you’re a victim of this syndrome. Your gay relationship is on thin ice if you’re communicating by assuming that what you said is understood, can go wrong. Speak to communicate, listen to learn, and validate what you think you heard.
Mistake 4:
Being in gay relationship because it’s comfortable: Here’s a little secret that we’ll keep just between us boys! No matter how much money he has, available party favors, “to die for sex,” or the size of his apartment. if the relationship is not working, then accept. It’s a false sense of comfort to believe “If I leave, I’ll be single and that’s bad.” Yes, you’ll end up single and without his money, or the party favors, or the great sex. But you might actually be happier, and isn’t that what you’re really after?

Creating a false sense of comfort; believing you need others to feel “worthy” when all you need is love… self-love, to be exact.

Mistake 5:
Separate lives: I’ve never quite understood gay relationships in which the partners are in a serious, committed relationship but don’t live together. I’m not advocating that on first date, hire packers and mover and move-in immediately. I also understand that sometimes, things get in the way, like the question of “How would I hook up with other people if we’re living together?” If that’s your priority, maybe it’s time to rethink this whole “relationship” thing.

If you can’t live with your man, aren’t you able to live with other relations in your life? How you do anything is how you do everything. 


Mistake 6:
It’s just to make friends: Apps have overtaken all of our lives. I also hear of more and more gay men using gay-specific apps like Grindr, tinder, and the likes, for making friends and networking. Honestly. If you can’t be fully honest in your gay relationship about your app fetish, then your gay relationship won’t be honest with you!

Mistake 7:
Money talks: Being gay doesn’t mean that your immune to having “money talks”. If you can’t talk about the big stuff, then the rest of the talks are just kinda fluff. Not that money is everything, but still you need to have a real conversation about expenditure.


Having real conversation about the state of the finances could lead to more cash in the love bank


Mistake 8:
Talking about sex: Let’s not talk about sex. Really? Gay men are supposed to be the kings of sex. Talking about sex seems to be everyone’s hangup, even in a gay relationship.

What doesn’t get talked about doesn’t get done.

I’m quite sure you have your own list of “mistakes” made, anticipate making, or refuse to admit you’ve made, in your trail of gay relationships. But remember that there are no mistakes: only purposeful lessons we all learn as we live, learn and grow. Now go find your man and tell him you love him. He may wonder what’s gotten into you, but he’ll also definitely feel good to know that.

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