Is Your Over Possessive Nature Killing Your Relationship?
The term, possessiveness in relationship is often understood to be wrong but the fact is that two individuals come into a relationship because they posses each other with the feeling of love. It can thus be a boon or a curse.
But just like every other thing in this world, excess of anything is bad…. this brings us to the question, “How much possessive is enough?” “Is My Over Possessive Nature Killing My Relationship?” “What degree of possessiveness/jealousy do you think is healthy in a relationship?” “Possessiveness: Builds or ruins a relation?”
Let us see some of the signs which will help you understand if you are being over possessive and if the same is being loathed by your boyfriend/girlfriend. Do you fight with your husband/boyfriend every time he returns late home?
- Do you keep checking your girlfriend’s / boyfriend’s Facebook account and quarrel if other boy/girl flirts with him or her online?
- Do you start coughing if your partner talks or helps some other girl?
- Do you keep checking call log and messages of your partner?
- Do you keep accusing your partner of lying or hiding things from you?
- Do you loathe any new friends your partner makes?
- Do you feel low when you call your partner and phone is engaged?
- Do you keep accusing them of giving you less time?
- Do you feel whatever you do for your partner is not being valued enough?
- Have you ever faked some action to make your partner be with you or just to get more care?
- Do you often manipulate arguments just to prove something to him/her?
Few thoughts on how can we balances our possessiveness score:
1.Individual Space Is There – Every individual needs his/her own space which should never be trodded on. No one can be the owner of that space except the person himself. Personality trainers have always said that every person should draw a circle around themselves in which no one should be allowed. If that space is hindered it effects the persons mindset and then starts the problems. Till the time personal space is not affects possessive in relationship is good.
2.It’s Not A Binding – A relationship should bound two individuals but not bind them together. The feeling of binding is similar to the feeling of being captured. Everyone enjoys freedom and that should be allowed. When in a relationship, whenever the person feels senses threat to his/her freedom, problems start.
3.Questions Are Less – A matured person should be allowed to do what his/her heart feels is right. Everything does not have a reason. Like suddenly going off on a long drive, wanting to be lonely etc. When questions are asked on such spontaneous act, it’s human nature to get disappointed. Most of the time we face this problem with our parents but when the same comes from the partner, it becomes a threat to the relationship.
4.Fear Of Hurting Is Less – Understanding is one of the key factors in a relationship but it could not be taken as an opportunity. One should be able to remain as spontaneous as ever even after being in a relationship. The fear that your act might hurt your potential other can bother the freedom which both enjoy together.
5.Both Don’t Try To Change – We fall in love with someone because of some special points and then try to change him/her according to us. It is the worst thing to do and it surely leads to break up. No one changes, one can act to make you happy but within the person remains the same. So, why force someone to act?
The right amount of possessiveness in a relationship makes one feel special and cared. To love and to be loved is the most beautiful feeling.
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